How do you destroy failure?

Lately I have been going back and forth with myself. I am 27 and no where near the success I had planned for myself. No where near the dreams and goals that I have set for myself. Even the other day during one of my moments of deep thought and self analyzation I thought, 'Damn, your a loser.'

I began to realize that if my life was placed under a microscope... it would slowly start to frey and that I will be exposed as a fraud. I am not as happy as I appear to be all the time, I make hypocritical statements, I never finish anything that I start, I have a wonderful way with words that seems to get me off the hook for the peculiar situations that I find myself in that could probaly be classified as lieing if you really picked it apart. I am wondering if I am on the way to failure.

I cannot help but consider facts that may be on the brink of reality: what will my life be like if I really don't start getting booked regularly, and what if my blog never gets any consistant advertising,  and where will I go if I don't get accepted into The New School, what if I am just driving up to Storrs for FREE every week for a career in radio that will never happen.

Thinking of failure and the possibilities of it does not keep me awake at night, but it does occasionally fill my thoughts throught the day. I must admit that I was beginning to slip into a bit of a funk until I came across an email today that I had been saving since december. I could not have opened it at a more appropriate time.

Theory: How do you destroy failure?

The Allen Boy: You replace it. The only failure is to quit.

About 10 minutes after I read this email Tomiko Fraser-Hines posted this and affirmed the message: In spite of your own perceived shortcomings, you are STILL destined for greatness. You are here on purpose. Come from behind fear & just BE!

This is when I realized  FAILURE = FEAR.  If I am worried about failure then I am afraid. So here's to looking at fear in the rearview.

You know what? I am not being stagnant. I am not waiting on things to happen, I am making them happen. I am not looking for an opprotunity, I am creating one. I say something and then do it. I have to work harder on ignoring the Haters. I can no longer doubt myself, or the promises that God has made me. I have to work harder to tell people about love. I have to start LOVE. My goals and dreams are coming true, RIGHT NOW... they had to start somewhere. I also realized, that under a microscope... everything is ugly, everyone has faults but the key is recognizing them, working on them, and then figuring out how to make them work for you.

Hope this helps.
~Theory